Long Live Midgets!--Literally.
Women taller than 5-foot-2 may be missing a gene mutation that helps them reach their 100th birthday, according to a study in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.
Suck it tall people! I will out-live your asses to see the apocolpyse!
...this is what a lifetime of having to hem pants and dresses will do to a gal. midget rage.
Cut off his pair if you can't jog in a pair
In the past week there have been two incidents in the DC metro area of female joggers being assulated. One incident was in broad fuckin daylight on the W & OD. the asshole was a white dude on a cruiser bike. The other incident was in rock creek park and the asshole was a drunken latino. The media and police are of course urging women to run in pairs.
How sad is it in todays world where a woman cannot go for a jog by herself w/out the fear of being raped? Sometimes running by yourself is the best form of therapy. I will take a path in the outdoors over a treadmill anyday, but now, not so much.
So I'm going to develop this special belt to wear while jogging. A holster if you will. It will hold mace/pepper spray, a knife, a cell phone w/digital camera, flares and marbles.
So it works like this- you first mace the dude, but if that doesn't do the trick then you cut his dick off with the knife. then you take a picture of the asshole with the cell phones digital camera as you call 911. then to help out the police you light off flares to make it easier for them to find the dickless bastard. and last but not least, the marbles to leave them in a path behind you for him to trip on a la scooby doo style.
I'm wondering hwo long it will take to patent this device. I need to make it light weight, stylish, yet effective.
Clean Sweep!
I'm getting a roommate shortly. Which means I need to get rid of about half my belongings, aka crap, to make room for her. It's going to be a good thing. I need to clean house and I need a bit of a restart as well.
I'm trying to pretend I'm in an episode of TLC's clean sweep. Though it would really help if I had a handsome English dude telling me what to throw away. And it seems I'm constantly on commercial break, meaning I um haven't exactly started yet. But I will soon. soon! yes..after these short messgaes...
Leaving on a a jet plane....
I'm going on a two week long vacation to the west coast. more specifically SF California, Canada and Alaska. I'm beyond excited. I can't wait to see my friends in SF and I've been wanting to go to Alaska for years. We're doing an Alaskan cruise- so not too much time in AK, but still, any bit I can get, I'll be estatic. AND this is the longest vacation I've been on! And no, this does not mean I'm money bags, it means my friend Heather and I are frugal ass dealin biatches. We're going on bike tours instead of aerial tours. and etc. The countdown begins...
follow me on twitter while I'm out there..well, if I can get cell reception while out there. and yes, my twitter name is geezthings
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