ok so a new week with hopefully no psysho male bashing posts. I blame it on my brain being in a vice grip by sinus monsters. And possibly too much pepto bismo. which I found is useless when you're doubled over in abdominal diress until 3 am. pink stuff you failed me! onto homeopathic stuff like ginger tea, yoga, heroine. etc.
so some snippets from some convos from the weekend:
first convo:
at the public library check out counter
Librarian: Hi there, I can help you! do you need to just check out some items?
me: um, yeah and pay some fines too.
libararian: ok well let's see if we can check out the books first then take care of your fines (scans my library card) hmm..oh um, no it appears we have to pay the fines first.
me: ok that's fine (whips out check book)
librarian (scanning the card again) hmm. um, this can't be right...let me try it again (scans card again) uh 90 dollars?...
me: yeah, that sounds about right. do I make the check out to FCPL?
Yes..I think I single handidly fund the FCPL Christmas dinner at mortons every year. I know as a daughter of a retired libarian I should be better. I was trying to be frugal and check out books instead of buying them at borders (computer langauge books) but the books got swallowed in my condo..and blah blah. I suck. as a new years reoslution i will not acrew any new fines. the lovely folks at FCPL will have to have a potluck christmas dinner this year, sorry folks.
another convo:
mom: hey G, father kevin was saying that they're going to have a blessing of the animlas at the church on friday! you should bring Pica there!
dad: nanette, it's a blessing, not an exorcism!
I seriously may bring her...if not then I think i'll siphon some holy water out of the hand dipping bowls and put some in my cats water bowl. maybe the evil rug uninator demons and ankle biting kitty bitch smacking demons will finally begone from her feline body. b gone! I comand you urine demons! stop making angry biscuit noises at 5am!
another convo:
A: where are you?
G: um, well you called my home phone, so I'm currently walking into my bedroom..why?
A; oh right, well, I'm trapped
G um. like mentlaly emotionally physically?
A: in my basement. my bright light that my family is locked me in the basement before leaving for NJ. the doors and windows that go outside are alarmed and my dad locked the door that goes rom the main floor down to the basement.
G: so you either have to find a hatchet and break through the door that goes upstairs or set off the alarm.
A: or somehow get jagger (family dog) to disable the alarm
G: how about when you open the back door then I'll open the front door and disable the alarm
A: you'd need a key to get into the front door bright light. see, I knew you were like family!
G i meant..you can somehow um squeeze a key under the door and I can run up tp the front and unlock ..ok fine i've only had one cup of coffee!
update: she was able to open the back door, run to the front of the house and disarm the alarm in the set amount of time. and no, her family did not lock her in her basement on purpose- as much as that would make for a a more intersting story.
oh and guess who got a photo of tiki barber on saturday?..and no I don't mean I bought a photo of him. yes I was feet (ok maybe 20) away from his hotness.
1 comment:
I think Rhonde is hotter...
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